This, my friends, is what it's all about. I'm so flipping happy that I finally caught one of these sweet moments on video. Hooray for sweet memories.
Note: Asher's new kissing sound effect is "oom pah". I don't know where he got that. But it's cute, so we go with it. And yes, Elias coos in almost complete sentences.
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Monday, May 7, 2012
Quick update. And strawberry pickin' with my faves.
I know. I know. I know, I know, I know. I am so slacking off on my blog posting. I write so many posts in my head on a daily basis and then when bedtime rolls around, I choose sleep.
Elias was on a good sleeping roll, but now seems to be feeling less than stellar and is back up a lot and spends most of his time during the day attached to me nursing. Which, is fine. I've learned to savor these moments as much as I can. And let me just say, he's a good baby. Such a good baby. Which is why I call him 'Easy E'. I marvel at him all the time.
I'm back working at the helm of Krobe Interactive. And can I just say how thankful I am to work with clients that totally know my situation. They know that I'm at home with my boys - that these boys are my priority. And they know that I'm committed to having an awesome team and doing awesome work. They never question that. And that confidence boosts me.
I applaud moms that stay at home with multiple kids. I have help here, because I'm working throughout the week, too. But, let's just be honest, I would suck at doing it alone even without any work to do. I get overwhelmed. Being a mom is so hard. And running a household is hard, too. I know people say that all the time, but I don't think you truly understand it until you're in that position.
I'm still not great at handling my emotions when I get run down, tired, cranky or when Asher gets run down, tired or cranky and I want to scream. It just equals a lot of whining and fussing and crying from both of us. Bless Rusty's heart when those times hit. He remains calm and laid back and lets me and/or Asher work out our issues on our own. Sometimes, I think I need time out, too. :)
Yes, this post is all over the place. And yes, I need to post Asher's second birthday pictures. Until I get that organized, enjoy these sweet shots from strawberry pickin with our faves - Christal and Hadley!
Elias was on a good sleeping roll, but now seems to be feeling less than stellar and is back up a lot and spends most of his time during the day attached to me nursing. Which, is fine. I've learned to savor these moments as much as I can. And let me just say, he's a good baby. Such a good baby. Which is why I call him 'Easy E'. I marvel at him all the time.
I'm back working at the helm of Krobe Interactive. And can I just say how thankful I am to work with clients that totally know my situation. They know that I'm at home with my boys - that these boys are my priority. And they know that I'm committed to having an awesome team and doing awesome work. They never question that. And that confidence boosts me.
I applaud moms that stay at home with multiple kids. I have help here, because I'm working throughout the week, too. But, let's just be honest, I would suck at doing it alone even without any work to do. I get overwhelmed. Being a mom is so hard. And running a household is hard, too. I know people say that all the time, but I don't think you truly understand it until you're in that position.
I'm still not great at handling my emotions when I get run down, tired, cranky or when Asher gets run down, tired or cranky and I want to scream. It just equals a lot of whining and fussing and crying from both of us. Bless Rusty's heart when those times hit. He remains calm and laid back and lets me and/or Asher work out our issues on our own. Sometimes, I think I need time out, too. :)
Yes, this post is all over the place. And yes, I need to post Asher's second birthday pictures. Until I get that organized, enjoy these sweet shots from strawberry pickin with our faves - Christal and Hadley!
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Postpartum hives
Yes, that's a lovely topic isn't it?
And yes, I've been really quiet on here lately. I'm trying to soak in every moment with my boys - and get back to work, too - and that's not leaving me loads of time to blog. But, I write a blog post at least once a day in my head. I just need to make it to the keyboard from time to time.
Anyways, postpartum hives is what I choose to write about after such a long break. Glorious, eh? But, I think it should be written.
For those that follow me on Facebook, or were blessed enough to see these hives in person, you know that I had a random hives occurence when Elias was about five weeks old. These things were disgusting. And when I say hives I mean huge welts that covered giant portions of my torso. There are photos, but I don't want to see them again myself, so I'm sure you don't want to check them out.
It all started with purchasing some of that famous Palmers cocoa butter lotion for stretch marks. I had had some previous stretch marks itching on my belly and thought that now was the time to soothe and get those bad boys fading. I applied the lotion and went to bed. I woke up in the middle of the night itching like mad. I immediately thought of the lotion, ran downstairs and took a cold shower around 3 a.m. I thought I had an allergic reaction. Anywhere I scratched, red marks were appearing with bumps inside of the scratch marks. And these strange mosquito-looking bites were appearing and fading. The shower, plus some Benadryl calmed me down.
The next day, no sign of them. I told my friends what a horrible incident it was and I swore to never touch the Palmer's again. That night, at bedtime, the bumps were back. And worse. They were everywhere. And they kept popping up across my chest, where my bra straps were, pants waistband, anywhere that fabric was touching me with pressure. I was miserable. I took more Benadryl and tried to calm down.
The next day I called my OBGYN first thing and got an appointment. I thought maybe I had developed that PUPPS rash postpartum (which a quick Google search confirmed does happen). I was so sad thinking that this rash could be around for who knows how long. And that some people had to quit nursing to see improvement. I didn't want to do that. And in true Kira fashion, I was flipping out.
During the appointment my skin flared up more. Each of my breasts was a giant hive. They went around my back like giant burn marks almost. The OBGYN said she'd never seen anything like that, it wasn't PUPPS and recommended I see a dermatologist. Mine just happened to be in the same building, so I walked right up there and begged for an immediate appointment. I must have looked desperate (and gross), so they worked me in. The derm took one look at me and said, "Those are hives."
He proceeded to explain that hives are very common in the postpartum period (excuse me, what?). He said that he doubted it was based on an allergy. He didn't think it was related to the lotion I mentioned. And that it would just take some time to go away. He prescribed a regimen of Allegra and Tagamet (usually for heartburn, it is used to boost antihistamines) every 12 hours. I started the meds, saw a tiny bit of improvement and hit up Whole Foods for anything oatmeal and soothing in their bath department.
I was a wreck. I cried and cried. Google made it seem like this happen to lots of women, and they associated it with postpartum hormones and breastfeeding. A quick call to my doula resources made that breastfeeding thing seem ridiculous, which helped to somewhat calm me. Still, there were loads of other women out there that had these hives. Some even noted that it began after using Palmers (but most women use Palmers at some point or another, right?).
The more I freaked out, the more the hives came. That night, they spread like wildfire. They were up and down my legs, around my chest and waist, up and down my arms. (Holy crap I'm itching just typing this.) In a panic, I called my dermatologist. He leaves his cell number on his office phone for emergencies and this felt like one to me. Despite all the meds, I was exploding in GIANT hives.
He calmly said that this is normal. That again, these things happen. He sees it often. To take the meds every 8 hours if that's what it took to keep the hives away. He assured me this was compatible with nursing and told me to get some rest. That night, I took the Allegra, Tagamet and Benadryl more often. (The pediatrician, pharmacist, dermatologist and OBGYN all ok'ed these drugs, by the way.)
The 8-hour cycle seemed to keep the hives at bay. I was scared about my milk supply and began pumping after day time feedings to up my supply gradually. (Looking back, I don't think my supply was affected. I actually ended up with lots of milk from all that pumping.) So, I went to bed that night hopeful that the hives would stay away. Night time was their worst time. And that night, my face joined the mix. My lips were huge. My eyelids almost swelled shut. There were hives along my chin and forehead - in addition to the rest of my body. I came downstairs in tears and showed Rusty. He was a little in shock at that point. I think we both thought the worst was over. Again, I called my dermatologist. He kind of irritated me with his tone. I explained, crying, that I was a new mom, I was hormonal and terrified that I was going to stop breathing or something. These hives were taking over my face at this point. He assured me that this was again, normal. I took Benadryl, held Rusty's hand and finally fell asleep. I had to wake up in the middle of the night and put my hands in a bowl of ice water, they were so swollen with hives. And on fire.
The next day the derm called me to see how I was. I said the hives were going away again. He said to stay on the meds for two weeks and try to come off them and see what happens. If the hives came back, to repeat for another two weeks. I cried and flipped out. I was going to have to deal with this for weeks? I called my regular practice doctor who agreed that I should take the meds more often and even suggested something stronger. I also went to my psychiatrist because upping my Zoloft amount happened around the same time, so we thought maybe it was freak side effect? Not likely, but we switched my meds to Lexapro just in case.
I talked to a friend who is a nurse. She told me that I needed to pray about it. She assured me that this was all normal hives behavior. It was unlikely I was reacting to something and would have some kind of breathing troubles at this point. I knew I needed to get a grip and give this to God. I just was having a hard time doing so. I talked to another friend who deals with hives from time to time. She told me that stress aggravates them. That I needed to calm down, keep cool (literally and figureatively) and get ahead of these things. Another friend sent me some Bible verses that spoke to my heart. I prayed them and tried to calm my spirit. My mom and I decided I needed to read a book or something at night when I was nursing. Clearly, without the distraction I was stressing too much. It must have all worked because that night, no hives. Praise the Lord!
From that point on, no more hives. I weaned myself off the meds a week or so later and so far so good. The only thing I can think of is that during that time I changed fabric softener sheets. Maybe that was related? Or maybe, as the dermatologist said, these things can just happen postpartum. I've since heard of others with similar cases. It kind of blows my mind to think about the power of our hormones and all that's going on in my body after having a baby.
So, I'm writing this all here thinking that maybe another panicked mom will be Googling one night, covered in hives, and freaking out. To that mom, I say this: take the meds, take them more often than it says if you need to, try to stay calm and they will go away. It totally, totally, totally sucks. I know. Damn it sucked. I'm so thankful they have passed. Let's just hope they stay away!
Now that I'm itching all over.... eek.... I'm now banning the word 'hives' from my blog.
And yes, I've been really quiet on here lately. I'm trying to soak in every moment with my boys - and get back to work, too - and that's not leaving me loads of time to blog. But, I write a blog post at least once a day in my head. I just need to make it to the keyboard from time to time.
Anyways, postpartum hives is what I choose to write about after such a long break. Glorious, eh? But, I think it should be written.
For those that follow me on Facebook, or were blessed enough to see these hives in person, you know that I had a random hives occurence when Elias was about five weeks old. These things were disgusting. And when I say hives I mean huge welts that covered giant portions of my torso. There are photos, but I don't want to see them again myself, so I'm sure you don't want to check them out.
It all started with purchasing some of that famous Palmers cocoa butter lotion for stretch marks. I had had some previous stretch marks itching on my belly and thought that now was the time to soothe and get those bad boys fading. I applied the lotion and went to bed. I woke up in the middle of the night itching like mad. I immediately thought of the lotion, ran downstairs and took a cold shower around 3 a.m. I thought I had an allergic reaction. Anywhere I scratched, red marks were appearing with bumps inside of the scratch marks. And these strange mosquito-looking bites were appearing and fading. The shower, plus some Benadryl calmed me down.
The next day, no sign of them. I told my friends what a horrible incident it was and I swore to never touch the Palmer's again. That night, at bedtime, the bumps were back. And worse. They were everywhere. And they kept popping up across my chest, where my bra straps were, pants waistband, anywhere that fabric was touching me with pressure. I was miserable. I took more Benadryl and tried to calm down.
The next day I called my OBGYN first thing and got an appointment. I thought maybe I had developed that PUPPS rash postpartum (which a quick Google search confirmed does happen). I was so sad thinking that this rash could be around for who knows how long. And that some people had to quit nursing to see improvement. I didn't want to do that. And in true Kira fashion, I was flipping out.
During the appointment my skin flared up more. Each of my breasts was a giant hive. They went around my back like giant burn marks almost. The OBGYN said she'd never seen anything like that, it wasn't PUPPS and recommended I see a dermatologist. Mine just happened to be in the same building, so I walked right up there and begged for an immediate appointment. I must have looked desperate (and gross), so they worked me in. The derm took one look at me and said, "Those are hives."
He proceeded to explain that hives are very common in the postpartum period (excuse me, what?). He said that he doubted it was based on an allergy. He didn't think it was related to the lotion I mentioned. And that it would just take some time to go away. He prescribed a regimen of Allegra and Tagamet (usually for heartburn, it is used to boost antihistamines) every 12 hours. I started the meds, saw a tiny bit of improvement and hit up Whole Foods for anything oatmeal and soothing in their bath department.
I was a wreck. I cried and cried. Google made it seem like this happen to lots of women, and they associated it with postpartum hormones and breastfeeding. A quick call to my doula resources made that breastfeeding thing seem ridiculous, which helped to somewhat calm me. Still, there were loads of other women out there that had these hives. Some even noted that it began after using Palmers (but most women use Palmers at some point or another, right?).
The more I freaked out, the more the hives came. That night, they spread like wildfire. They were up and down my legs, around my chest and waist, up and down my arms. (Holy crap I'm itching just typing this.) In a panic, I called my dermatologist. He leaves his cell number on his office phone for emergencies and this felt like one to me. Despite all the meds, I was exploding in GIANT hives.
He calmly said that this is normal. That again, these things happen. He sees it often. To take the meds every 8 hours if that's what it took to keep the hives away. He assured me this was compatible with nursing and told me to get some rest. That night, I took the Allegra, Tagamet and Benadryl more often. (The pediatrician, pharmacist, dermatologist and OBGYN all ok'ed these drugs, by the way.)
The 8-hour cycle seemed to keep the hives at bay. I was scared about my milk supply and began pumping after day time feedings to up my supply gradually. (Looking back, I don't think my supply was affected. I actually ended up with lots of milk from all that pumping.) So, I went to bed that night hopeful that the hives would stay away. Night time was their worst time. And that night, my face joined the mix. My lips were huge. My eyelids almost swelled shut. There were hives along my chin and forehead - in addition to the rest of my body. I came downstairs in tears and showed Rusty. He was a little in shock at that point. I think we both thought the worst was over. Again, I called my dermatologist. He kind of irritated me with his tone. I explained, crying, that I was a new mom, I was hormonal and terrified that I was going to stop breathing or something. These hives were taking over my face at this point. He assured me that this was again, normal. I took Benadryl, held Rusty's hand and finally fell asleep. I had to wake up in the middle of the night and put my hands in a bowl of ice water, they were so swollen with hives. And on fire.
The next day the derm called me to see how I was. I said the hives were going away again. He said to stay on the meds for two weeks and try to come off them and see what happens. If the hives came back, to repeat for another two weeks. I cried and flipped out. I was going to have to deal with this for weeks? I called my regular practice doctor who agreed that I should take the meds more often and even suggested something stronger. I also went to my psychiatrist because upping my Zoloft amount happened around the same time, so we thought maybe it was freak side effect? Not likely, but we switched my meds to Lexapro just in case.
I talked to a friend who is a nurse. She told me that I needed to pray about it. She assured me that this was all normal hives behavior. It was unlikely I was reacting to something and would have some kind of breathing troubles at this point. I knew I needed to get a grip and give this to God. I just was having a hard time doing so. I talked to another friend who deals with hives from time to time. She told me that stress aggravates them. That I needed to calm down, keep cool (literally and figureatively) and get ahead of these things. Another friend sent me some Bible verses that spoke to my heart. I prayed them and tried to calm my spirit. My mom and I decided I needed to read a book or something at night when I was nursing. Clearly, without the distraction I was stressing too much. It must have all worked because that night, no hives. Praise the Lord!
From that point on, no more hives. I weaned myself off the meds a week or so later and so far so good. The only thing I can think of is that during that time I changed fabric softener sheets. Maybe that was related? Or maybe, as the dermatologist said, these things can just happen postpartum. I've since heard of others with similar cases. It kind of blows my mind to think about the power of our hormones and all that's going on in my body after having a baby.
So, I'm writing this all here thinking that maybe another panicked mom will be Googling one night, covered in hives, and freaking out. To that mom, I say this: take the meds, take them more often than it says if you need to, try to stay calm and they will go away. It totally, totally, totally sucks. I know. Damn it sucked. I'm so thankful they have passed. Let's just hope they stay away!
Now that I'm itching all over.... eek.... I'm now banning the word 'hives' from my blog.
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Comparing baby pictures
I hear a lot that my boys look just alike as babies. But, I think they look totally different most of the time. Other times, I see the similarities.
Anyways, here are a few similar shots I found looking back through the blog for Asher and through my phone for Elias. Enjoy!
Anyways, here are a few similar shots I found looking back through the blog for Asher and through my phone for Elias. Enjoy!
Thursday, March 15, 2012
The Grand Entrance of Elias: my VBAC birth story
 |
| Elias Leigh Kroboth 8 lbs, 21.5 inches February 22, 2012 |
To begin his story, let me back up a few weeks. We had chosen our doula, Ashley of Birth Right Doula Services to support us during labor and help us do all we could to avoid a repeat c-section. I'd been going weekly (and sometimes biweekly) to my chiropractor for adjustments, since my pelvis was not quite aligned. And, proper alignment was important for labor and vaginal deliveries. And, starting at 38 weeks, I was having induction massages with the wonderful Cheryl of Great Blue Heron Massage. Her wisdom and encouragement proved to be a very important part of my journey.
All along, I just had this feeling that I was going to have a VBAC and it was all going to go well. That was that. I remember telling Ashley that I just knew it was all going to work out. That feeling pretty much continued until labor was here and I started to freak out a little. And then, when it came time to actually deliver, I started to panic about my c-section scar and possible rupture. But, you know, that's just me. The worrier.
Starting on Saturday, I was having 'real' contractions. I woke Rusty up and said, I think we're going to have a baby today. He shrugged me off and said, you take forever to do anything Kira. It'll probably be more like Wednesday. (Funny, I just now realized he was right.)
For the next few days, the contractions were constant while I slept (well, tried to sleep), but would come and go during my waking hours. My doula and I realized that it was my mind (and anxious thoughts) that were keeping me from going into active labor. Only when I was in bed and relaxed could my body do what it needed to do. So, each night, I'd go to bed and have contractions all night. Wake up and they'd taper off.
That is, until Tuesday morning. They had a new level of pain associated with them. Their regularity was taking a notch up and I asked Rusty to take me to my appointment with Cheryl. I didn't feel comfortable driving should the contractions happen to continue. And I knew, once Cheryl worked her magic, it was possible the contractions would keep right on coming. We ventured to see Cheryl. She was so reassuring and kind and encouraging. She said my body was ready, the baby was in perfect position and it seemed I was on my way.
12 noon: On the way home, contractions really began. I would have to stop what I was doing while they came and went. I called Ashley and said, I think this is it. I really wanted her there because it was in my nature to freak out and just run to the hospital so that someone would take care of me. And Rusty, well, he wasn't much help. He was a nervous wreck too. And this was my first time actually going into labor. So, neither of us knew what was normal and what wasn't.
4PM: The afternoon continued. So did the contractions. Ashley arrived with her bag of tricks and I felt immediately more comfortable. We decided to go to the OBGYN and have them check me. I was at 2 cm dilated and 90% effaced. Which, kind of bothered me because it hurt so bad already and I was only at 2?!
We came back home and Ashley and I walked around the neighborhood. I know we looked crazy. Contractions would come and I'd lean on her and sway. Or I'd find a tree to help. The movement really got things going. I couldn't really eat dinner with everyone, I went and laid on the bed with my hips in the air and my head on the bed. Cheryl said this seemed counterproductive, but would help the baby get in position. While doing this, I felt a pop and what I would describe as warmth bubbling out and upwards (because, remember, I was inverted).
Yep, my water broke. And the fluid wasn't exactly clear. So, I called my doctor and she said to head to Rex. My plan to stay at home as long as possible was kind of cut short with this new development. I called Rusty down from bathing Asher. I called Joni over to watch the big bro and we loaded up. I was in some serious pain at this point. The intensity was wild.
7PM: Once we arrived, they made me lay in the bed for monitoring. I was only at 3 cm and 90% effaced (cue another panic because this seemed so slow after all of the pain). I didn't want to lay in that darn bed. That was the worst position ever for what I was feeling. But, Elias wasn't responding well to labor (that was familiar from Asher's birth) and they wanted to monitor me for an hour or so. There I laid, with Ashley holding one hand and Rusty holding the other. I'd only get up to use the bathroom and my sweet husband would go with me and help me work through the contractions along the way.
The nurse didn't seem too keen on me getting up and moving around. They offered me some IV pain meds to take the edge off, but said it would likely chill the baby out, too. Which, to me, didn't make much sense. They wanted to see some activity with Elias's heart rate, so why would I take something to mellow us out? I asked to please be allowed to get up and walk around (even though everything in me wanted my epidural right. then. and. there.).
I told myself that I needed to do everything I could to keep things going without intervention to make the probability of a VBAC more likely. I wanted to look back on this labor and know that I did all I possibly could to try to keep things progressing naturally. And I knew that I owed it to myself to deal with the pain and do some walking - postponing the epidural for a while.
10 PM: I was given 45 minutes to do what I wanted. I walked and squatted. And at the end of that time I said, I can't do this anymore. I need my epidural. I just can't handle it. I was leaned across my bed. I remember the moment so clearly. I was exhausted from laboring for days, not sleeping well and just being plain physically drained. I needed relief.
The epidural was put in place, they checked me and I was at 5 cm. Yay for progress! My goal was to make it to 6 before the epidural, but this was close enough for me. I was so proud of myself for walking. And for stressing to the nurse that I needed to get up and out of that bed. I had done what needed to be done.
For the next few hours we sat in the dim room and relaxed. Rusty and Ashley were right by my bedside. The nurses swapped out for some reason or another, but I liked the new one better so I was ok with that. Around midnight I told Ashley that I felt pressure. (She later told me she didn't think it was possible it was 'that' pressure because it hadn't been very long.) I chalked it up to the fact that I needed to empty my bladder and had the nurse come handle that.
1:15 AM: By the time that was done, they checked me and I was at 9.5 cm and 100% effaced. Holy crap. This was going to happen. Ashley and Rusty were so congratulatory and were pumping me up for delivery. I was starting to get really, really nervous. I had everyone checking my c-section scar for any sides of pulling. I was asking over and over about how a rupture would feel even though I had an epidural. I realized I was going to get to push, and didn't know if I could even figure out how to do that. The labor equipment was wheeled in.
We talked about my preferences for delayed cord clamping and having Elias immediately placed on my chest. Everyone was very supportive of everything. But, after that last check, the nurse told me that there was meconium in my fluid. This meant that the respiratory nursery team would be in the delivery room and that Elias wouldn't come to me first. They would need to suction him out and remove any gunk that he may have ingested. The good news is, my fluid was clear hours earlier, so it's not like he'd been floating around in the funk for a long time. So, we held out hope that he hadn't swallowed anything.
While waiting for that final half a centimeter, we realized Elias's birthday would be 2/22. Then, we realized we were in room #222. And then, we realized it was about 2:10 AM and, if we somehow could make it happen on our time clock (which clearly wasn't happening), he could be born at 2:22 AM. How cool is that? But that time came and went. The nurse checked me and I was fully dilated and ready to push.
Ashley had Rusty preparing cool washcloths for my head and neck. My entire body was shaking. Ashley said that's common during transition and that my body was probably reacting to some of that despite the epidural. We popped a few honey sticks in me to get my energy up. And, we began to push.
2:30 AM: I starting pushing somewhere around this time. I just remember thinking, there is no way this is working. I don't feel anything. I don't think I know what I'm doing. But I guess I was doing it right. Ashley was rooting me on. Rusty was (beside my head) cheering me on. They could see Elias's hair and that was encouraging.
2:47 AM: I pushed through 4 or 5 contractions and Elias was born! I did it! I did it! Elias was here and healthy and crying (although under the care of the special care nursery nurses). I could see them caring for him across the room while my doctor finished working on me. I was in no pain at all.
Elias was cleared of any gunk and placed on my chest with a pile of warm blankets on top of us. He immediately latched on and began nursing. I was such a proud mama! He looked up at me and held my finger. I stared down at him, in awe of what just took place. Even now it seems like a blur.
Rusty watched these first moments with me and Elias from by my side. I was thankful that as the daddy, he knew how important those first minutes were for us and just stood back and let us bond.
After a while the baby washing team arrived to give Elias his bath. They measured him. 8.0 lbs and 21.5 inches. He liked having his hair washed; it calmed him.
The nurses prepared me to move to my recovery room and Rusty held Elias for the first time. He had such a proud and happy look on his face. Love that moment. Love. Love.
Because the birthing center was overcrowded (I think it's because of the previous weekend's snow weather system), my recovery room was the door across the walkway which was actually still in the delivery area. (Apparently there were moms giving birth the next day in the main hospital tower of Rex because the birthing center was at capacity. It was wild.)
We tried to get some sleep. But my adrenaline was going bazerk, so I didn't sleep at all. Elias was proving to be quite the little sleeper and nurser, of which I was very thankful. Rusty snored next to me in the recliner. And I found myself reliving the events of the day, and looking forward to seeing Asher the next day.
In the morning, Asher arrived. The big brother. I fought back tears the whole time. I knew that this was going to rock his world. I knew he wouldn't completely understand. And I just wanted to make it all ok for him somehow.
He did a pretty good job of ignoring the baby in the room. We eventually got him warmed up enough to want to say hello and give his brother a kiss. Then, he was back to crawling under the doorway curtains, getting into everything and giving me a heart attack with all the germs he was surely encountering. (Even now, Asher does a stellar job of ignoring Elias when he wants to, but we're making progress. Slowly. More on that later.)
My recovery has been fantastic compared to the c-section. It was an amazing, amazing experience. I'm so thankful for everyone on my 'VBAC team' and for the blessing of being able to go into labor naturally and vaginally deliver my second son. I'm slowly healing, but healing nicely. I started taking my anxiety meds while at the hospital, so that those would be in my system to hopefully ward off any PPD. Of course, I'm not getting much sleep, but I'm so thankful for two healthy boys and a wonderfully supportive husband and family.
Our first night home, I was downstairs feeding Elias and Rusty was upstairs bathing Asher. He texted me and said, We are a family of four now. How great is that? So great. So very great.
Welcome to our world, sweet E. We are so glad you're here.
